Sorrow
by UnknownQuantity
Summary: A short story set before and after Shepard's third romance conversation with Liara. It is intended to expand upon the Liara/Female Shepard romance and add to it whilst not being plot-intrusive, hence an addition rather than a story change.


Preamble: This short story is a fanfic based around the relationship you have with Liara in Mass Effect 1. It assumes that Liara was rescued first, Feros has been freed from the Thorian and Noveria has just been completed. It carries on the story from what happened to this point in game as well as the events detailed in my previous short fanfics, Captivated and Patience, which I recommend you read before reading this. Although they're not absolutely required and each short story should be suitable for reading by itself.

Unlike my previous short stories this is NOT set immediately after the romance conversation with Liara. Instead it is largely set before the romance conversation but after talking to her about Benezia, with only the very last section being set after the romance conversation itself.

These fanfics are intended to act as additions to the story as a way of further adding to the romance between Shepard and Liara but not to change its basis in any way. If you spot a major inconsistency with the rest of the story then feel free to point it out and I'll do some revisions. Enjoy!

**Sorrow**

Naomi walked out of the medical bay with a preoccupied air. She was troubled by Liara's demeanour after Noveria. Liara had seemed cold and distant, hardly surprising given what had happened on that frozen world but it still bothered Naomi. She didn't like to see Liara in such obvious pain.

"Shepard," said a gruff voice, interrupting her thoughts.

"Wrex," she replied, looking over at the krogan mercenary.

He took a drink of something unidentifiable. "You been speaking to the asari?"

"Liara? Yeah, I was just checking on her."

"She ok?" At that Naomi blinked.

"Wrex, was that concern?"

He hesitated but rallied quickly. "No. I just want to know if I need to worry about her not performing on the next mission and whether she'll stick around. She's an asset we don't want to lose." He shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

Naomi smiled and sat opposite him, not fooled for a moment but willing to play along. "She says she's ok but I just don't know. For what its worth I think she'll fight just as well as ever. But she seems shut off. I think she's just holding it in. Liara wants us all to think she's taking it well but I just know she isn't. I can see the anger and sorrow in her eyes but I don't know what to do about it or even if there's anything that can be done."

Wrex grunted at that. "I don't know why anyone would want to keep it all in like that. When I get mad I just focus on tracking down who caused it and hit them. Liara should think about giving it a try. Trust me, when she punches Saren in the face she'll feel much better."

Naomi laughed. "Well if she asks me I'll pass on your advice. Talk to you later." She stood up and made to move away.

"Shepard?" Naomi hesitated and as she looked over at him she belatedly remembered about Jarrod. Wrex gave her a very serious look. "Keep an eye on her."

"I will do, Wrex." She replied with a sincere nod and then headed for her cabin.

* * *

Naomi was woken by someone knocking on her door. It was just before midnight ship time. She rubbed the sleep out of her eyes and climbed out of bed before tugging one of the straps of the vest she was wearing back into place from where it had slipped from her shoulder and checking her shorts were on straight. Satisfied that she was at least presentable to whoever it might be and hearing the bell ring again she went over to open the door.

Naomi didn't really know who to expect. Perhaps a crew member with a message from Pressly or maybe Garrus who had promised to share a drink with her. What she didn't expect was to find Liara standing there crying.

"Shepard, I…I'm sorry to wake you I…" Liara swallowed. "…I shouldn't have done that, I'm sorry, goodnight." She turned to walk away but Naomi grabbed her by the sleeve of her T-shirt, pulled her into the cabin and closed the door.

After making sure the door was locked again Naomi turned to face Liara, grasped her firmly by the shoulders and would have stared into her eyes if not for the fact that her head was down.

"Liara, what's the matter?"

Liara's voice was soft but steady, though tears still flowed freely down her cheeks.

"I'd just taken off my jacket and was lying in bed but I couldn't sleep. I know I said I was fine…and I blocked it out at first. But lying there on my own…I couldn't...I had to see somebody. So I thought…you said I could come back whenever and…"

"…it's your mother isn't it?"

Liara just bit her lip and nodded. Naomi sighed, pulled Liara close and wrapped her arms tightly around the asari.

"It's ok. Really. You don't ever have to apologise for waking me when you need me. And you don't have to pretend it doesn't hurt. Don't bottle this up. Let me help."

Liara's voice broke again, though whether it was from grief or anger Naomi couldn't tell. "It…it's just horrible what he did to her. I can't…"

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry we couldn't do more. And I'm sorry to have put you through that. He won't get away with it, I promise you."

Anger edged into Liara's voice. "I couldn't do anything. I just had to stand there and watch. I wanted to help but I couldn't."

Naomi couldn't think of anything to say to that so just held her tighter. After a moment Liara continued more quietly.

"At the end, when she was herself again I thought she could get away from it for good. For a moment I really thought we might just be able to heal her and everything would be fine...but he still had her didn't he? Despite all her power Sovereign's power was too strong for her to overcome. It wasn't enough."

"Liara, the fact that she was able to resist at all shows how strong your mother was. Nobody else has managed it; your mother was a strong person, just like you."

"I'm grateful that she died as herself but…"

"…but none of this should have happened at all. I know. I can't change what happened but I can promise you that I will do everything in my power to make Saren pay for this…for everything. No matter what I will see him answer for his crimes, because now it's personal."

Liara sobbed into her shoulder for a while before taking a deep breath and pulling away slightly.

"I shouldn't have woken you. You need rest. I promised not to let this interfere with things and here I am, breaking that promise. I'll go…"

"You are NOT going back to that cold bed in the lab. I'm not leaving you alone like this."

"But I…"

"Shh…" Naomi gently kissed the tears from Liara's eyes and, before she could protest, took her hand and led her over to the bed before lying down and pulling Liara alongside.

Naomi wrapped an arm around Liara as she curled up on the bed, her head resting on Naomi's chest. "You don't have to be on your own through this and I won't let you. I promised I'd be there if you needed me and I'm here for you now. Try to sleep." Using her free arm she started to stroke Liara's head crests.

Liara nodded slightly. "Thank you…Naomi."

At that Naomi smiled whilst Liara gently slipped off to sleep, her eyes wet but no longer weeping.

* * *

When Naomi woke up Liara was gone, the only traces that she'd been there at all were the warmth on the bed beside Naomi and her faint, sweet scent on the duvet and pillow. Naomi stretched and sat up. Another long day ahead.

After changing into her fatigues she made her way out to grab something to eat. It was still quite early and the ship was mostly quiet. Sitting at the mess table with a couple of datapads and picking at some alliance rations it was easy for her to get lost in her own thoughts. After a couple of minutes a laugh snapped her out of it. Ashley and Kaidan were walking in her direction with a couple of ration packs of their own, talking to each other and clearly oblivious to everything else.

"Good morning," said Naomi, pretending to have been reading one of the reports. The two of them stopped dead when they realised they weren't alone. "Getting breakfast? Come and sit down."

"Good morning, Commander," replied Kaidan as he sat down. Ashley stood there for a moment before sitting down looking a little uncomfortable.

"What's wrong, Williams?" said Naomi with a slightly evil grin. "Doing something against regulations?"

"No ma'am! I…uh…"

"Relax, Ash. I'm just teasing you." Ashley smiled at that but Kaidan looked puzzled.

"Are you two going to tell me what the joke is all about?" he asked.

Naomi shook her head. "I'm sure Ashley will tell you when she wants to. How are the two of you doing?"

Ashley shrugged. "Fine now that we're off that iceball. I don't know what was colder, the environment or all those damn corporate suits."

"Yeah, not the friendliest place Noveria," said Kaidan thoughtfully. Then he looked directly at Naomi. "More importantly how's Liara? That's got to have hit her hard."

Naomi shrugged. "She was pretty bad at first, but I think she'll be ok now. I'm pretty sure she's through the worst of it at any rate."

"I can't imagine that happening to me, losing myself like that I mean. And if it can happen to an asari matriarch…well it could happen to anyone."

Ashley nodded at that. "Yeah, Benezia just wasn't herself anymore was she? Not really."

"I know, I think that's what really got to Liara," replied Naomi. "But she's with us, and we'll see this through to the end one way or the other. I just hope that'll help ease the pain for her."

Ashley looked over Naomi's shoulder before grabbing Kaidan's arm. "We've got stuff to do. We've got to go, Commander."

"What?" replied Kaidan, confused before noticing where she was looking. "Oh right…yeah…er, stuff…speak to you later, Commander."

The two of them left in a hurry but before Naomi could turn to see what had made them leave a blue hand gently rested on her shoulder.

"Good morning, Shepard."

"Good morning, Liara."

Liara made her way around the table. She was clearly much happier than she had been the previous night. Liara sat facing Naomi before leaning towards her to speak quietly. "I wanted to thank you. For last night I mean. It meant a lot to me. It really helped to have someone there."

Naomi sighed. "Liara, you don't have to thank me. I promised you I'd be there for you if you needed me and I meant that. Whatever happens…whatever I have to do, whatever task I have to drop, I'll do it and always be there for you." She reached over and gently placed her hand on Liara's cheek. "I care about you, Liara. It hurts me to see you in pain. And I promise you we WILL get him."

Liara smiled. "I know. It's ok. I'm feeling much better now. I needed last night, it brought me peace. I'll be fine now. Knowing you're there for me matters more than anything." Naomi smiled in return, she could see in those beautiful blue eyes that this time Liara was genuine about being ok.

"I'm glad. I couldn't bear to see you like that a moment longer."

"You won't any more; you've helped me come to terms with what happened. All I want now is Saren to pay." Liara hesitated and then looked down shyly. "Sleeping alongside you was…pleasant, Naomi. When I woke I felt happy, contented. Even despite the circumstances, it was good to wake up like that."

"I felt the same; I haven't slept so well in a long time," Naomi's smile took on a mischievous edge. "Although it wasn't exactly what I had in mind for your first night in my bed."

Liara blushed almost purple at that, but couldn't help smiling. "Shepard!"

"What? You brought it up!" replied Naomi with mock offence.

"I…I need to think…I…" Liara stammered nervously, still smiling and got up. "Come and see me later and we'll talk." With that she hurried off back to her room. Naomi watched her go with curiosity, shook her head as if to clear it and then went back to her breakfast and reports.

* * *

Naomi walked back into her room unsure of herself for once. It was evening and her conversation with Liara had been illuminating but she hadn't expected Liara to be so forthright. The outcome both positive and negative. She sat down in front of her computer and activated recording to her personal log.

"Timestamp. Liara is definitely happier than she was last night. She appears to be over Benezia's death remarkably quickly and I'm very grateful for that. Seeing her so upset…well it wasn't something I could stand by and watch for long. Too painful."

Naomi stopped briefly to order her thoughts.

"I went to see her like she asked me to. I've never heard her being so candid before. I think she has come out of her shell a little due to last night. We talked about…well about asari unions; how important they are and their true meaning to her species. At first she claimed she was just trying to demonstrate why she had been so reserved."

Naomi laughed at the memory.

"That blush never gets less cute on her. She passionately described everything and her interest was as plain as the freckles on her face; but as soon as she realised what she was saying she denied it. As the conversation went on, however…well, she let her guard down entirely and admitted that she'd never thought about it before, ever, with anyone…until we met each other. I just wanted to kiss her then; I'd hoped she felt as strongly as I do but...well she never said anything much until now."

A sigh as she remembered the last part of the conversation.

"On the other hand because of everything going on she isn't sure if this is the time for the two of us, precisely because of how important it all is. I'm not going to push her with anything; I love her too much to do something like that. But damn it, if it wasn't for this…this…everything…then we could just go off somewhere together and take things at our own pace."

She slumped back in her chair dejectedly before continuing quietly.

"Then again, if not for this we would never have met. Liara is right. Perhaps when this is all over we can just disappear somewhere for a while; the two of us and how we feel about each other. But for now we need to concentrate on Saren, leaving aside personal feelings. However much that hurts."

Naomi reached across and flicked off the recording and switched off the privacy settings for her cabin. After a few moments Joker's voice came over the com.

"Commander? We're arriving back at the Citadel for resupply in about three hours now."

"Thanks, Joker. Give me a shout when our eta is an hour."

"Roger that, Commander."

Naomi just stared up at the ceiling. A tear softly rolling down her cheek.


End file.
